Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky-tacky,
Little boxes, little boxes,
Little boxes, all the same.

There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one
And they're all made out of ticky-tacky
And they all look just the same.

And the people in the houses
All go to the university,
And they all get put in boxes,
Little boxes, all the same.

And there's doctors and there's lawyers
And business executives,
And they're all made out of ticky-tacky
And they all look just the same.



my greatess fear
put in boxes
coming out just the same

happening to me now




fucking lrm

fuck i just realised that friendster makes me depressed.
its like
i go there and just view a few random old friends
then i think to myself.
fuck andrew
you used to mess around with that
who the fuck am i messing around with now

these memories that keep me awake at night
when will they let me rest.

i was such a bastard.
i think i need some closure

yes we are all just wasting our lives away.
i am feeling so fucked up right now.
mainly because reality really just hit me real hard
and it kinda hurts

i feel enlightened in a pretty fucked up way

life is such a piece of shit isant it
its just a game and god is just fucking up with us making the levels harder as we play on
its contradicting isant it when the one thing u work so hard in life to avoid happens to you
you forego all the pleasure and take all the pain
and it still happens to you
its like never smoking before in your life
and maybe even avoid walking along roads and stuff
and then one day you go to the doctor and find out you have lung cancer
stupid isant it
you feel like you wasted so much and for what?
for nothing
yes life is just a game
its just a game where you can never find what youre looking for
and find it when you dont need it anymore
my theory was always
god will give me cancer if he wills it
so why not smoke
god will kill me if he wills it
so why not live life on the edge
and the one thing i made sure not to push it
i just had to get it right
wheres the sense in that
someone tell me please
because it contradicts all the laws ever written
maybe the game really works that way
you dont get stds from sex
you just get it if god wills it
you dont get liver failure from drinking
you just get it if god wills it

i don't know about you but im getting really sick of this game.
maybe its about time to just give up and stop playing

i think its time to start bloging again ^^

anyway life lately has been a confusing piece of shit and ive been purely emoing for the last 4 days. i mean like totally. like i couldn bother to go out. skipping meals like crazy and when i do go out to eat its usually alone =( o ya may i add that i didn bathe in the last 4 days cos i was spending all the time i was at home in my room drinking/dotaing. so ya. and i dun even know why. just some mood bug thats been going around i guess.

anyway. im feeling better now and kinda packed till the next week. mostly due to goddamn fucked up projects but ya its an improvement.

abs training has been going pretty well if u dont consider the last 4 days. ive been eating so healthy its almost gay. like really really healthy no fried/bbq/skin/pork/mastard/desserts/snacks/CHIPS/kong guan biscuit/eggs and veges at every meal healthy. i need to buck up on the actual traing though. been slacking off a bit lately =(

anyways. me and kailin found this lst of 42 things to do in singapore and we're gonna try and finish it in a year =D haha. this is soooo eggciting and fun can. she printed it out and pasted it on her wall so she can cancel things of 1 by 1. anyway here it is

Things to do in Singapore idea 1 : Grab your 200 mega pixel camera and head down to Chinatown .... ok, ok, 2 million pixel is just as good. Take some pictures of the old shops and their almost 90 degrees staircases. If you like taking pictures of elderly people (you may be sick), there are many sitting around the wet market doing nothing.

Things to do in Singapore idea 2: Go to Bukit Timah Nature Reserve for mountain biking or walk around and smell the green. Bring a bottle of water and shades.

Things to do in Singapore idea 3: Take a ferry (cost only $2) to Pulau Ubin and explore the island. You can also rent a bike or a worn out motocycle. Try taking a taxi if you can find one, they can climb rough terrains better than jeeps. Explore some of the Malay kampungs and prawn farms ( or mosquito farms).

Things to do in Singapore idea 4: Visit Changi Prison. It's free entrance for both tourist and inmates.

Things to do in Singapore idea 5: Visit the Siang Lim Si temple at Toa Payoh. Watch people get blessed. For the non-believers, you can count the number of deities inside ... it should occupy you for one hour. Have a chat with the monks there, they may sell you discount tickets to heaven.

Things to do in Singapore idea 6: Go to the East Coast Park for a swim and followed by satay bee hoon at the hawker centre. Barbeque by the beach or camp over, but you need to apply for a permit for the use of BBQ pit.

Things to do in Singapore idea 7: Take a train to Changi Airport. Buy two cups of coffee, find a comfortable seat in the departure hall viewing gallery, watch planes take off and ask yourself why you are not on the plane heading for a vacation.

Things to do in Singapore idea 8: Take a map and walk through MacRitchie Reservoir. Bring a bottle of water and insect repellent. A mobile phone will be handy in case you are lost and you need the army to look for you.

Things to do in Singapore idea 9: Go to Sim Lim Square and check out the latest laptops and hardware. Shop around for a rough estimate first and make sure cameras are quoted with lens and parts and laptops are quoted with batteries.

Things to do in Singapore idea 10: Go jogging from Kallang River to Benjamin Sheares Bridge. Watch people canoe and enjoy the breeze along the way.

Things to do in Singapore idea 11: Take a train from the Tanjong Pagar Railway Station. You can go over to Malaysia and back within a day, and if you lose your passport, it's within a year.

Things to do in Singapore idea 12: Try water skiing at Pungol.

Things to do in Singapore idea 13: Make your own kite and fly them at the Marine South open field. After that, you can have a delicious steamboat dinner at the many steamboat restaurant nearby.

Things to do in Singapore idea 14: Go to the Flea Market at Sungei Road. Most people called it the Thieves Market because most of the things sold there are not bought by the merchants. They sell everything from old records to your ex-neighbour's granny size underwear.

Things to do in Singapore idea 15: Go cycling at the Sembawang Park. Quiet and nice even on the weekends. Cycle to the end of the park and you can get very near to a shipyard ... and you can see some of the huge cargo ships and lovers refuelling there.

Things to do in Singapore idea 16: Bring your own pit and barbeque along the Upper Pierce Reservoir. But if you feel oily, don't jump into the reservoir, you may end up in Things to do in Singapore no. 4.

Things to do in Singapore idea 17: Visit the Tekka Market at Serangoon Road for a variety of fruits and vegetables. There is a stall selling one of the best Bryani Chicken Rice I have ever tasted.

Things to do in Singapore idea 18: Go fishing at Pasir Ris Park.

Things to do in Singapore idea 19 : Visit the Kinokuniya Bookstore at Ngee Ann City.If your are dizzy after browing the library size bookstore, sit down for a cup of tea at the cafe inside the bookstore. If you feel like a bookworm that day, then head for the Borders bookstore nearby at Wheelock Place for a second helping.

Things to do in Singapore idea 20: Visit the Sungei Buloh Nature Park. Bring binoculars and bird watch. After that, you can buy some hydroponic vegetables home at the nearby farms.

Things to do in Singapore idea 21: Walk along Changi beach at night. And if you are there till about 11 p.m, hang around the public carpark and see she-males in business. If you feel hungry after that, check out the stalls selling chilli crabs and BBQ sambal sting rays at the hawker centre. But I don't think you should be hungry after looking at She-males.

Things to do in Singapore idea 22: Watch cute Japanese kids play softball at the Singapore Polytechnic field. The male coaches are not too bad either.

Things to do in Singapore idea 23: Watch Indians play Cricket at the Ceylon Club at Balestier Road. After that, take a walk along Balestier Road and see old shophouses build in the 1950s. Bak Kut Teh and chicken rice stalls are also quite famous along this road.

Things to do in Singapore idea 24: Go shopping at Mustafa Shopping Centre along Serangoon. They are open 24 hours. See if you can find travel suitcases for less than $20 and watches as low as $5. But check out the spice corner. Sorry, no spice girls around there, mostly mature male workers in sarongs.

Things to do in Singapore idea 25: Have a cup of coffee and ice cream at Holland Village. Lots of restaurants and pubs for a chill.

Things to do in Singapore idea 26: Visit the Botanical Gardens. Pick up some knowledge at the Evolution Garden also. Photo taking is allowed if you know how to operate the camera.

Things to do in Singapore idea 27: Walk along Geylang from Lorong 4 to Lorong 40. It's a mix of brothels and coffeeshops in this area. Try and catch dirty old men in action with the Chinese ladies in the local coffee shops. Free STDs if you decide to patronise.

Things to do in Singapore idea 28: Go window shopping at Orchard Road. From Gucci to Giodano. The Louis Vuitton store in Takashimaya (Ngee Ann City) has a security guard. You can take photos with him, he is just as bored. But he doesn't wear a hat like those in Buckingham.

Things to do in Singapore idea 29: Take a cable car ride from Harbour front to Sentosa. Nights are good for a fantastic view of the city lights.

Things to do in Singapore idea 30: Drive up to Mount Faber or walk. Drop by Alkaff Mansion for a piece of Singapore history. The mansion is now a restaurant.

Things to do in Singapore idea 31: Drop by Raffles Hotel, Singapore oldest hotel.

Things to do in Singapore idea 32: Bring your kids back to your primary (junior) School and show them where you sat.

Things to do in Singapore idea 33: Bring your girlfriend or wife to your secondary (high) school and show her where you made out with your first girlfriend.

Things to do in Singapore idea 34: Walk along Boat Quay. Imagine how the migrants make a living along the river 100 years ago. Then visit the Chinese Heritage Centre at Chinatown to see the actual living quarters of a migrant.

Things to do in Singapore idea 35: Visit the zoo

Things to do in Singapore idea 36: Visit the night safari if you cannot get enough of idea 35.

Things to do in Singapore idea 37: Drive pass Choa Chua Kang Cemetry and head down to the Sarimbun Scout Camp. Try and find the Sarimbun Battle Site for a piece of Japanese War time history.

Things to do in Singapore idea 38: Visit the Yellow House a.k.a. The Sultan's Place. It's the old Istana where the Sultan Hussein lived. Sultan Hussein negotiated the Treaty with Stamford Raffles in 1824.

Things to do in Singapore idea 39: Walk along Leng Kee Road and visit car showrooms. You can test drive a Mercedes or Lexus if they are not too busy. But crash one and you will be busy for a long long time.

Things to do in Singapore idea 40: Look for new apartment launches. You can pick up some new deco ideas and some inspiration to work harder.

Things to do in Singapore idea 41: Bring a picnic basket and sit with the foreign workers along the Serangoon Road open fields. Offer to take some pictures for them and help them send some home. After that you can skip Idea no. 5.

Things to do in Singapore idea 42: Bring a tent and camp near the East Coast Sailing Club. Watch the surfers at sunset.

so lame but exciting rite. wheeeeeeeeeee

anyway the real reason i decided to blog again is really cos the mood has been making me write quite a few poems in my head so ya i'll post them soon.

shes happy now
thats what matters






am i lying to myself